Since ABC will televise Saturday’s Ohio State-Wisconsin game with Brent Musburger and former Buckeye Kirk Herbstreit calling the action, it’s time to dust off the rules for the “Brent Musburger Drinking Game.”
NOTE: If you follow these rules exactly, it’s very likely you and your party members will be passed out drunk by halftime, so be careful. Kickoff, by the way, is scheduled for 8:00 p.m. ET.
Rule 1: “You’re looking live…” This is one of Bent Musburger’s catch phrases that he utters at the start of each telecast. When he says this nugget, everyone must stand up and finish their drink.
Rule 2: “The Pardner.” One person is picked to be the Pardner at the beginning of the game. The first time Brent says “Pardner,” the Pardner has to take ONE drink, and then picks someone else to be the Pardner. The next time Brent says it the new Pardner has to take TWO drinks, and then pick a new Pardner, and so on and so on. The Pardner must wear a special “Pardner” hat.
Rule 3: “Folks.” Everyone drinks ONE when Brent says “Folks.” However, if Brent says “Hold on Folks,” everyone must drink once but the first person to drink has to finish their drink for not holding on.
Rule 4: “It’s a foot race!” Whenever Brent says “It’s a foot race” everyone has to finish their drink. The first one done becomes “That Man” and gets to punch the Pardner in the arm.
Rule 5: “There’s that man again.” After someone becomes “That Man,” they get to give away THREE drinks to someone of their choosing the next time Brent says “That Man.” That person then becomes “That Man.” If Brent says “That Man” before “It’s a footrace,” The Pardner becomes That Man. If The Pardner becomes That Man first, he gets to punch the new That Man in the arm twice after giving away the three drinks. There must also be a special hat for “That Man.”
Rule 6: Every time Brent mentions the title sponsor, Windows 8, everyone has to yell out the name of the sponsor and take TWO drinks.
Rule 7: “In the college game.” Whenever Brent says this little gem, everyone must say “Shut the f**k up Brent,” drink TWO and punch the Pardner in the arm.
Rule 8: Mentioning a Big XII school during a Big Ten game. Whenever Brent does this, the first person who names the Big XII school’s mascot gets to make somebody drink for 10 seconds, since there’s 10 schools in the Big XII.
Rule 9: Calling a touchdown before the player actually scores. For example, during an interception return, Brent says “It’s a touchdown!” before the player actually scores. In this case, everyone must start drinking and continue to drink until the player actually does score. If by some odd event, the player does NOT score, everyone must finish their drink.
Rule 10: “Kirk, my man.” Whenever Brent says “Kirk, my man”, the Pardner gets to choose someone to be Kirk. From that point on, that person must be referred to as “Kirk, my man” until the game is over. “Kirk, my man” gets to give away FIVE drinks the rest of the game any time Brent says “Kirk, my man.” If someone talks to “Kirk, my man” without calling him that, they have to do a shot. If there is someone playing the game actually named Kirk, that person is automatically “Kirk, my man.”
Rule 11: “The Big Cat.” If Brent has a pet nickname for one of the players during the game, for example calling Andy Katzenmoyer “The Big Cat,” everyone must drink FIVE anytime Brent uses this nickname. However, “Kirk, my man” does not drink but gets to give away FIVE drinks since this person already has a nickname of their own.
Rule 12: “John Saunders.” The first time Brent quips with John Saunders, everyone must drink ONE. The next time, everyone must drink TWO, and so on and so on.
Rule 13: In the booth. Whenever there’s a camera shot of Brent in the booth, the Pardner must make a toast to Brent. After the toast, everyone must drink ONE.
Rule 14: “My Friend.” Every Pardner gets to choose a “friend.” The friend must always get up to get the Pardner another drink (since the Pardner will be doing quite a bit of that). However, when Brent utters “My Friend” the friend gets to punch the Pardner in the arm for making him get up so much.